The word “toast,” like so many other words in the English language, have many different denotations AND connotations. So, I wanted to look at some of them, and end up with a somewhat strange sentence as the punch line… if I get that far. I’m treating this post as a Freewrite, with a maximum time limit of 15 minutes. So, here we go!
I have a bread-maker that I have used a few times to make breads or dough. Although these breads have tasted good on their own, there’s just something about transforming slices of bread into TOAST. So, this gives one definition of the word “TOAST:” the result of putting bread into a broiling situation, so as to blacken and crispify it (or would it be brownen and crisp up? I leave this interpretation up to you!)
It reminds me of a time that I worked at Runza during a closing shift, and the bread-toaster was not working well–a few pieces of bread had gotten stuck and become charcoal. But, I was hungry, and was willing to eat it (outside of the view of customers, of course). It became a running gag during that night that Burnt Toast staved off the Dark Side of Noah!
Another slangy use of the word “toast” is to say that you are defeated, screwed over, etc. For example, you might have said that pretty much any opponent of UConn’s women’s basketball team was toast early in the game, or that toward the end of a blowout game, you can say that the losing team is toast.
I’ve mostly seen this use of the slang term “toast” in the context of games. Bridge was one of my favorite contexts, referring to when someone is in a hopeless contract. Back in 2013, there was a session of Hondo Bridge where one of the boards was titled in the post-hoc, “The teacher is toast”. Yay for the revisionist history that was presented in this movie!
However, I first got the slang from playing video games, most often associated with when your character gets into a situation that will cost you a life/try/other game unit. Or, as Falco says in Sector X: “Hurry up or you’re toast!”
But it’s not just solid things which can be toast. Instead, we’ve got the toasts that usually involve alcoholic drinks. And for me, they sometimes include a double-entendre. Why? Someone might propose a toast like this (and this actually happened at some of the weddings that I have attended):
(Proposer): “Let’s raise our glasses for a toast.”
(Noah removes his spectacles (i.e. glasses) during the toast speech. Afterwards, with the “cheers!” and clinking of wine glasses, Noah clinks his eyeglasses with the wine glasses that were raised.)
(Yes, somehow I am able to see nonetheless–I’m not completely blind when I’m bereft of glasses).
Let me see if I can get a punch line going. I’m not quite sure where it was going to go, but, here goes:
Toasting toast while toasting? You’re toast!